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June 2023

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Feature Article

Wandering through the child’s heart

Childen 12bka23

By Dr.Sangeetha Kalabhairav

Today’s children are not just talented but also creative in their own ways. I feel they are getting trapped in the well of our expectations.

As children, we were more carefree. We would play and study. The games we played were not like those of today’s generation. I must say that we have had the best times of our lives. We learned real-life lessons from our elders and our peer groups. Every small thing we came across had a lesson to teach us. We enjoyed and found satisfaction in the little things we did, such as listening to music on the radio or rewinding and forwarding the tape recorder. We had limited television viewing time, so watching our favourite cartoon once a week was a herculean task. Listening to my grandmother’s stories was a wonderful experience. She was my first superhero. The snacks that she prepared during Ugadi, Deepawali, and many other festivals were a true delicacy, which no present mitaiwala could match in taste. Playing with friends after dinner on the veranda with my mom watching and spending time with us is now a dream as most of us are working moms now.

Children these days have a lot more to do than expected. Somewhere, we as parents are to blame. We cannot give them much time, so they find themselves occupied in most of the present coaching classes like sports, drawing school, learn music and dance after the regular school time. We are proud of their accomplishments but also feel guilty because we are robbing them of their childhood.

I wish kids could spend the entire day playing like we did when we were kids. But when we see the world now, it’s become too competitive. The kids of this generation are going through a similar situation. Though we feel they are becoming highly skilled, somewhere they are losing their life as a child.

We should realise that we should not compare them with their peers and that each child is different and best in its own way .

When I was a child, it was like we had to be good at one thing. But now children are almost naturally talented at everything they do, but it doesn’t stop there, and it seems something else is missing and not enough.

We have to be concerned about their happiness and achievements, appreciate them for all those little things they do, and tell them it’s okay sometimes to be a little behind than their peers. It’s ok to sometimes fail and try again. As always, failing is the stepping stone to success.

We always feel that they should be successful and live a happy life. We always want them to give us the best of everything that’s available. But we always forget that, while doing so, we’re not really being helpful. We’re simply encouraging them to put pressure on themselves and to always be in the rat race, oblivious to what they’re going through and what competition and comparison bring them into.

We are preparing a weak child for the future by keeping the innocence of childhood at stake. Because they are already working so hard, the children are missing out on the more important trivial aspects of their lives.

Before we blame society, we must blame ourselves as parents.We are just following our own way blindly, without considering the consequences, and only looking at the actual situation.

It is up to us to deal with this situation.

We need to free them from the traps of our own mad expectations. We should teach them teamwork. so that they spend their childhood in a happy way. Help them, be there for them whenever they need us, and make their childhood more meaningful than trying to be too much competitive and comparing themselves with their peers. Concentrate on their skills and creativity and help them achieve their dreams, which can be useful for their future.

“Never let the child within them die”

Author Dr.Sangeetha Kalabhairav, MS(Gen surgery), FDFS (MUHS, Mumbai), is an Assistant professor, at Dept of General Surgery, KIMS HUBLI. email: [email protected]

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